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And One to Grow On


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Comedy/Romance/, 2014, 21 min.

Synopsis The true measure of a family is honesty. In which case, the Dunphys are screwed. Phil (Ty Burrell) was all set to take Luke (Nolan Gould) to Autopsy Camp. Which is actually a dance class. Phil wanted to make sure Luke could dance as well as he could. (PHIL: That's why they called me King of the Dips!) After all, it was in Footloose where Kevin Bacon got the girl. (BTW IMDb, the 2011 version comes up first in the search. FIX THAT!!!) Luke was not happy, particularly when he was the only boy dancing with 20 very geeky girls. He even got his hair caught in one of their braces while doing the Charleston. But karma is a female dog this day, as Phil ends up getting arrested for a bunch of unpaid parking tickets on his car, all of which were at Haley's community college. The same Haley (Sarah Hyland) whom Claire (Julie Bowen) paid to take Alex (Ariel Winter) for driving practice because Alex is more conservative behind the wheel than Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly's love child.Meanwhile, Jay (Ed O'Neill) is not too happy about all the money he has to spend throwing Joseph and Manny (Rico Rodriguez) birthday parties on separate days, even though they have the same birthday. After all, there was still half of a cake and the helium hadn't completely gone from the balloons. But everybody would be back, including Cameron (Eric Stonestreet) and Mitchell (Jesse Tyler Ferguson), who had to play hardball with the place where they wanted to have their wedding reception. But the facility manager was playing hardball, too. The date they wanted was just taken by someone's sweet 16 party. Thankfully, it was one of Cam's students. And he had a plan.Since it was Sunday, Claire couldn't get more than a couple of hundred dollars from the ATM, but there was emergency cash in the house. If only she remembered the mnemonic device Phil created to describe where it was hidden this particular month. Meanwhile, Mitch and Cam were ready for some divide and conquer. It turns out the student who booked the hall was going to do a joint sweet 16 party with her BFF until they had a fight over a boy. Something Mitchell and Cameron were experts at. (MITCHELL: Of course usually it's gay men, not teenage girls, so we will have to adjust our approach to...not at all.) Mitchell goes to talk to Sophie, the BFF of Cam's student, and he tries to act all cool, saying how his niece always talked to him when she had troubles (in other words...lying through his teeth), while Cam went to talk to Tracy, his student, at the cell phone store where she worked. It went about as well as Mitch's. And since this was a sitcom, suddenly they were taking sides in the big Sophie-Tracy fight. But it did work...well, they were back together. And using the hall Mitch and Cam wanted. So, since Sophie and Tracy weren't fighting anymore, Mitch and Cam continued it for them.CAMERON: You hem and haw all the time! Remember Vegas? That show? But that's OK; we'll see that show again once that tiger un-eats Roy!But at least they weren't in as much trouble as Claire and Haley. Haley being in trouble because Claire called her up about the parking tickets and Claire in trouble because Haley blabbed that Claire paid her to take Alex driving because she couldn't stand it. Claire didn't have time, since she couldn't find the emergency cash in the Three Stooges DVD, a cheerleading outfit (that looked used recently...hmmm), nor the coffee table book about the Titanic. But she did manage to find it in the throw pillow on the couch.Meanwhile, Gloria (Sofía Vergara) had a "delicate" assignment to deal with. Manny was looking forward to returning the coat of one of the cheerleaders who was at Joseph's party. Even Gloria thought the girl was out of Manny's league, particularly when Manny wouldn't even give the time of day to another girl who was really interested in him. Gloria went to talk to Manny, who had put a few surprises in Amy's coat. Like Dutch chocolates, raspberry lip gloss, bath salts, and a scented candle.GLORIA: (in tears) Oh, I wish this had more pockets!Jay was preparing to line up a few girls Manny had a shot at, but Gloria had to admit she was moved by what Manny planned to do with Amy's coat. She thinks he has a shot with Amy. (JAY: I hope you have a picture of his heart so you can put the pieces back together.) Everyone starts arriving for the party, and Phil was mad at Claire for making him wait in jail for so long. Only this time, he wasn't getting any backing from Luke. Manny hoped doorbell #2 would be better, only to find Mitch and Cam still arguing. "The whole way here," according to Lily (Aubrey Anderson-Emmons). And then Haley came by to take her lumps from Phil about the tickets, while Alex came in to give Claire her lumps. Both Alex and Luke were livid because their parents lied to them, but suddenly Haley was defending Phil and Claire. With a couple of big whoppers of her own. She said Claire didn't want Alex to get her license so they could talk more during her practice driving, and Phil's story was the only way he could convince Claire to be with him in college was to show her what a great dancer he was. All was forgiven.PHIL: Did she learn that from us?CLAIRE: It can't be taught. It's a gift.Jay decided to have an intervention when he heard Manny on the phone talking about someone who was always making eyes at him and tried to get his attention. Jay told him he should take a shot with this girl...only she was six and was technically his niece. (Yup, he was talking about Lily.) Still, Jay told him he could lower his standards a bit, saying chemistry is key. You know right away or you don't. But Gloria needed a month to know Jay was the one, and Cameron said it wasn't instant for Mitchell and him right away. Not for one of them, anyway. Mitchell was tired of being insulted and insisted that he knew he loved Cam right away...and Cam agreed with that. Cam was the one who needed time to know Mitch was the one. Two months, in fact. Even Jay thought that was crazy. Naturally, Claire took six months, which made Mitchell think THAT was crazy. (PHIL: Six months? We were practically engaged by then!) On the good side, that meant Mitchell and Cameron could book two months later than their original first date...because that's when both of them knew. Thankfully, Joseph said his first word...Jay...before Jay could finish doing the math about Claire living with some guy she wasn't sure about yet. Now everybody was on-board with Manny trying to date Amy, especially Jay.MANNY: So it took you six months, huh Phil? I can do six months. (goes to give Amy the jacket)LILY: I'll be hereeeee!!!CAMERON: I'm not loving this.Oh, and Luke had been in his room very quiet for a long time. Claire thought Phil should go in there, but Phil didn't want to embarrass Luke. He knocks on the door first, and Luke screams at him to get out. But that happens with teenage boys all the time. He was practicing his dance moves. What did you think he was doing in there, you pervs!!!


Directed by Gail Mancuso  

Starring Ed O'Neill, Sofía Vergara, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, more...

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