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Slow Down Your Neighbors


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Comedy/Romance/, USA, 2011, 21 min.

Synopsis Mitchell (Jesse Tyler Ferguson) and Cameron (Eric Stonestreet) discover someone in their outdoor hot tub. They're ready to call the police...until they see how hot he is. They join Barry (James Marsden) in the hot tub, who is an expert in Reiki massage, which is to transfer all the negative energy out of someone and leave in positive energy. Without touching them. Cameron loves it, and Mitchell thinks it's bogus. Cam is not too happy with Mitch for writing off Barry for that one little quirk, as it is something Mitchell does all the time. Cam isn't happy, but Mitchell tries to make nice with Barry, who is cool with Mitchell thinking Reiki is phony. Then Mitchell tries it himself and is hooked. Mitchell admits to Cameron he was right. They love the new friendship, until they find out Barry didn't move into the apartment upstairs from them: the homeless Barry moved into Lily's play castle in the back. Cameron goes to kick him out, but Barry has set up shop in Lily's castle and refuses to go. And Mitchell will call 911 after Cameron admits he was right in the first place.Claire (Julie Bowen) is very upset because a driver has been speeding through their block. She waits for the driver to pass by and gets a picture of the license plate. She puts up signs all over the neighborhood saying "Slow Down Your Neighbors." Well, that's what it looks like to everyone, but she put the plate in the middle, so it was supposed to be "Slow Down...Your Neighbors." She insists Phil (Ty Burrell) help her put posters up all over the place, but Phil has a new client to meet who is very to-the-point and does everything very fast...including driving her car. Laura (Jami Gertz) even sees one of the posters up...the one Phil nailed up. She thinks this "crazy bored housewife" just needs to get laid. (Gee, Phil can take care of that, too. :-D )Manny (Rico Rodriguez) wants to ride his bicycle to school, but Jay (Ed O'Neill) would like his bicycle to be a little more manly first. Perhaps the training wheels should come off. Manny never learned to ride a bike because Gloria (Sofía Vergara) never did. She was always afraid of being snatched from the bike. Jay decides to teach both of them. Manny picks it up in an instant, but Gloria, despite Jay's reassurances it's safe ("You're like a work of art: if you get scratched, the value goes down."), she crashes into some bushes. She blames his teaching techniques, naturally, and feels she could learn better from someone with a more feminine touch: Phil. However, Phil is busy playing both sides of the Claire/Laura fight, so Luke (Nolan Gould) offers to give her lessons. Luke tells her to take all of her fears of riding a bicycle and just shoot them away. And he does...by nailing Gloria with a water gun and forcing her to pedal away from it. It works great, until Claire all but knocks her off the bike so she can chase the speeding car. She misses the car, which was in a garage, but she does meet Phil's new client, Laura. Claire's too winded from chasing the car, so Laura offers to give her a ride. Laura tells her about this crazy person in the neighborhood, and Claire understands where she's coming from. Of course, they're talking about each other, and Claire gets taken for a joyride by the speeding Laura. And Phil has a lot of apologizing to do.And perhaps Luke's teaching methods have merit, as he uses the water gun to make Haley (Sarah Hyland) remember the Phoenicians invented the modern alphabet.


Directed by Gail Mancuso  

Starring Ed O'Neill, Sofía Vergara, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, more...

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